"I didn't do it!"

No matter what Isaac tells you, I did not chew on his shoes. I would never sneak into the kids' rooms and chew on their toys!!!! I have no idea how that toy car got into my crate. Well, let me just say this... things left on the floor are fair game as far as I am concerned. By the way, I am way above eating crayons, sticks, grass, dead frogs, paper, and peanut shells. I do not like the insinuation that I will eat ANYTHING. Ok, so maybe I will eat anything, but it is not my fault that my stomach is sensitive to dead frogs and peanut shells. I can't help it if my delicate paws can't endure the cold, wet grass in the mornings either. I have no other choice but to relieve myself on the patio. I take it as an insult when you mumble under your breath that I am a lazy dog. And furthermore, you were the one that left the gate open. It was my right to explore the neighborhood. If we are to make this living situation work, you are going to have to realize that I AM A DOG, a puppy in fact. Give me some room to grow will ya?! One last thing, thanks for loving me anyway. I do enjoy the lap time in the evenings, fetch in the backyard, and my comfy bed.


Love,
OLIVER